Empathy helps you relate to others on a profound human level, understand their problems together, and support the people around you. If you’re a highly empathetic person, you might identify as an empath: someone who can sense others’ feelings and relate to them on a deeper level.
Staying so mindful of everyone around you can get tiring. It might even have significant impacts on your own life and make you feel tired and drained a phenomenon sometimes known as empathy or compassion fatigue.
So what are the emotional triggers for empaths, and how can you avoid them? Recognizing the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that affect you most is the first step to understanding your role as an empath and developing self-awareness and self-control.
What is an empath?
The term “empath” describes a person who feels another person’s emotions. Someone who identifies this way experiences high levels of compassion and empathy. Understanding that you’re a highly empathetic person can help you express your feelings and work through your reactions to other people’s emotions.
Identifying as an empath has become more common in the past decade or so. But while empathy is a well-defined trait that appears in formal documentation like the American Psychological Association Dictionary of Psychology the term “empath” isn’t officially recognized.
It’s an informal way to express high sensitivity to empathy. Some empaths also identify as highly sensitive persons (HSPs), a term coined by psychologist Elaine Aron.
When you feel empathy, the brain measures motor, sensory, and emotional stimuli to comprehend another person’s experience and respond appropriately. Whenever someone suffers, you show them support and understanding and when they are cheerful, you’re excited for their happiness. Empaths feel these emotional responses on a more extreme level.
- Empaths and HSPs react to people’s feelings more deeply than others do, sometimes to the point of sensory overload. If you’re very sensitive to the energy around you, you might find that your emotions are influenced by others and become hard to control.
- If you aren’t intentional about separating another person’s emotional pain from your own, you could set yourself up for empathy fatigue.
- Being able to understand how someone else feels is helpful, as long as you look after yourself. Boundaries allow you to look out for people while still putting your mind and heart at ease.
- If you set boundaries, you can build stronger relationships with your friends, partners and family, create helpful relationships at work and interact with kindness every day.
Signs that you may be an empath
If you feel overwhelmed by other people’s emotions, you may be a highly empathetic person. Here are some common characteristics of people who identify as empaths or HSPs:
1. You experience the emotions of those around you
You take in other people’s feelings and experiences, whether they are bad or good ones. If you’re in an environment filled with joy and gratitude, you feel that same positive energy. At the same time, you pick up negative feelings such as anger, anxiety and pain which can cause you to feel emotionally drained.
So, if your friend mentions they’re going to be a parent, you might rejoice together over the news and their happiness. Also, if your best friend has a lousy day and wants to talk about it, you might share in their anger, regardless of how you’re feeling at the same time.
2. You notice when people are insensitive.
You may experience lasting negative emotions when people are selfish, unkind or arrogant. People who aren’t as empathetic might be able to brush off these experiences, but you could find it harder to do so. A slight or indirect contact may really throw your mood off.
If you have to deal with a rude customer, it’s possible that you’ll still feel upset about it long after others have moved on.
3. You are often exposed to more sensory information than you can handle.
Spending time at a loud event or in crowded spaces might affect your energy more if you’re an empath or HSP. It is possible that noisy places with overlapping sound such as crowded rooms, make you feel like shutting down.
Light, sound and excitement at a concert might cheer up a less sensitive person easily. But as an empath, you might feel overwhelmed by the noise and crowd.
4. It’s important to spend some time alone.
As an empath or HSP, you might need regular time to yourself. Because social interaction is more emotionally tiring for you than for others, you may feel more tired after being with people. Being alone helps you relax, let your mind rest and separate yourself from people’s strong emotions.
If you don’t get enough time alone, you might struggle to be social or feel tired in body or mind. You might not be able to set limits in your relationships because you don’t want to upset anyone, even if it’s harmful to you.
5. You want to be perfect in everything you do.
Many sensitive people use perfectionism to help them cope. It’s possible to worry about conflict, disappointment or frustration from another person, even if they have not shown those feelings to you before. Striving for perfection to avoid conflict is a common habit of empathetic people.
In your job, you might often put in extra hours, be stressed by deadlines and notice even the tiniest points. You might try to do everything perfectly, just to avoid disappointing your supervisors.
8 emotional triggers for empaths
If you’re an empath or HSP, understanding some common emotional triggers can help you set boundaries and take better care of yourself. Here are eight things that can set off a panic attack:
1 . Recognizing the pain of someone close
Empathetic people absorb the energy around them. If someone near you hits a low point, it can deeply affect you. If your friend is grieving the loss of a loved one, you might feel the same way even though you haven’t lost anyone yourself.
2. Expecting a lot from yourself
If you identify as an empath or HSP, chances are you’re a people pleaser. If you cannot accommodate all the demands others have for you, it might upset you to let them down.
If your manager asks you to help with a project after hours, you might feel guilty about saying no, but it’s your right and working too much can result in burnout.
3. When someone tells you to “move on”
It’s okay to show your emotions. However, if someone responds to you with contempt, frustration or annoyance, you might think you’re being too much or that you’re being overdramatic which can be upsetting.
If your partner tells you that you’re overreacting, you could feel guilty about your emotions or start to doubt what you feel.
4. Feeling helpless
Most highly sensitive people have a natural ability to nurture others. If you can’t help someone in need, you may feel powerless and very concerned.
If a friend has a work problem and you’re not sure what to do, you might feel like you didn’t help them, even though it’s not your fault.
5. Spending a lot of time with one person
Empaths and HSPs typically enjoy deep connections in their relationships, but sometimes too much of a good thing can feel overwhelming. Being with a friend or partner on vacation might make you feel like you have to be with them all the time, so you won’t take time for yourself to rest.
6. Being informed about injustice
A few people may watch news about tragedy or hear about injustice, feel sorry and then forget about it. But as an empath, you may have a more extreme reaction and find it hard to let go of those feelings. Learning about a natural disaster in a different country may cause you to feel very strongly.
7. Trying to focus too much on your success
If you pay attention to how others feel, you might not like it when the situation is reversed. When you’re suddenly surrounded by people who are talking to or watching you, it can be a bit much to handle. You might worry that people at work will judge you when you give a presentation.
8. Sensing that I don’t belong
As an empath or HSP, you might do your best to make others feel comfortable. If a person doesn’t respond in kind, you might feel you’ve done something wrong, even if they didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.
If you notice that someo
How to manage your emotions as an empath
ne doesn’t include you in a conversation, you might think they don’t like you and are leaving you out on purpose.
Learning how to deal with being an empath or feeling strong emotions can help you take care of your mental health. Here are tips for empaths, HSPs, and other people who want to manage their emotions.
Learn empath boundaries:
Recognize what causes your problems, set limits and control your own behavior. Try to be with people who accept your boundaries. Should someone’s continual pessimism drag you down, you may wish to limit how much you talk or spend time with them.
Let people know you understand how they feel.
There will be those who don’t get why you are sensitive and that’s fine. If you’re not comfortable in crowded places, it’s okay to skip a big party to please your friend. Your decision stands, even when someone else does not like it.
Make sure you are your top priority.
You must look after yourself before you can help others. If you’re emotionally drained or recovering from burnout, you can’t support someone else with their emotions. Pay attention to your needs and choose a plan for self-care that helps you, then support yourself when you are feeling triggered.
Don’t hold back your true feelings
Not speaking up doesn’t solve your problem. It’s simply a way of saying you have to deal with them on your own. Speak out if you need help and don’t be afraid to ask for it.
Don’t be afraid to say no:
You can’t be there for every person who needs you. Those who care about you will realize that you can’t always be there emotionally for them. Tell others what you need and learn to refuse when you want some time alone.
Be around people who make you feel good.
As an empath, you might absorb all types of feelings, not just the bad ones. Surround yourself with people who improve your mood and decide not to let negative people bring you down.
You can start keeping a journal.
Use journaling to manage your anxiety or stressfulness. You can understand and let go of negative thoughts.
If you have bigger problems, look for help.
Empaths and anxiety sometimes go hand in hand. High emotional awareness and sensitivity can make you feel anxious to the point where it negatively affects your emotional well-being. Should you feel more anxious than regular, tell someone close to you or get support.
See how it feels to you.
Experiencing high levels of empathy, or being a sensitive person, is a gift. If you identify as an empath, you can better relate to other people’s feelings and connect with others on a deep and profound level.
But empathy is a double-edged sword. You might take in emotions that influence your own feelings too much and it’s not always easy to let them go.
Learning what the emotional triggers for empaths are is a good way to acknowledge your emotions and avoid situations that affect you negatively. Work on knowing yourself and make sure you have healthy boundaries. You can still be kind and helpful to people in your life.
Frequently Asked Questions
What is an empath?
An empath is someone who feels other people’s emotions deeply and can intuitively sense their energy. Empaths often experience heightened levels of compassion and emotional awareness, but this can also lead to emotional fatigue if not managed properly.
What are common emotional triggers for empaths?
Common triggers include seeing someone suffer, experiencing sensory overload, striving for perfection, feeling helpless, being told to “get over it,” learning about injustice, getting too much attention, and feeling left out.
How can empaths set healthy boundaries?
Empaths can set healthy boundaries by identifying their triggers, learning to say no, limiting interactions with toxic or overly negative people, and communicating their needs clearly. Keeping strong boundaries is important for us to stay emotionally well.
What are the signs of being an empath?
Signs include absorbing other people’s emotions, being sensitive to insensitive people, frequently feeling sensory overload, needing alone time to recharge, and striving for perfection to avoid conflict or disappointment.
What are some self-care tips for empaths?
Journaling, spending time with positive friends, focusing on mindfulness, making time alone and setting limits can all be part of self-care. You should also see a professional if your emotions or worries seem too much to handle.
